The expected and the unexpected

Its been a week since I blogged. And though I told myself that I would try and blog every day I am at least happy that I am doing once a week. My husband was actually surprised the other day when I told him that I did make a post every week...
Anyways work has kept me busy and so has a holiday in Goa. We are just back and I must say... blistering weather or not, we had a blast. It has been one week where I have been completely cut off from the world. No TV news, no newspapers, no gossip with the neighbours on whats happening in the world or around us. In fact no new information at all.
When I came back I thought I would feel a lacuna in terms of catching up with the world. But you know what, nothing has changed... Pakistan is ready to implode, our own leaders are still working hard at the circus called election run up, polarisation of communities is getting more acute and all the dailies tribulations of corruption, lawlessness and poverty are going on their on sweet paths.
So did I really miss anything. I dont think so... Like a friend loves to say "Same old shit, new day".
But enough of lamenting the hopelessness of the world. This trip of mine opened new perspectives for me in terms of holidaying. It was a trip to Goa with a two-year old. What I did expect was a lot of tantrums and crying thanks to being tired or hot. But no... my little angel rocked. She made friends easily, she danced on a boat cruise, she kicked off her shoes and ran on the sand, she jumped into the pool with her dad, began howling her head off and then slowly decided that "hey, this ain't so bad after all".
Of course this Goa trip wasn't what everyone would expect it to be... thanks to anoushka ( and I mean this in a positive way), we drank, but did not drink ourselves silly, we went sightseeing but spent a bomb on an AC taxi for her. We learnt new tricks to beat the heat. We visited new restaurants that turned out to be mind-blowing, all in a bid to keep her happy. And you know what, we ended up having a blast. It has also given me inspiration to start a new blog... on restaurants we visit. Sudhakar and me love to eat and experiment and so very soon, I will have a new blog. All about the restaurants we eat in.

I earned it... its mine

I belong to the unfortunate class of people in this country. The one called the salaried class. We are the ones' who bear the brunt of what the end of the financial year brings - Income Tax. It would have been one thing if the system of taxation made sense and there was no way of escaping it. If everyone paid it, without exemption, then I would feel a bit justified. But of course its only the salaried people coz your bank statement is going to reflect a salary.
Another consolation would have been is that even if I was among the unlucky ones who do pay the government a tax, seeing it put to good use would have made me feel better. But I still live in a rented house, the roads can put the moon surface to shame, the country reeks of corruption. I have to shell out for everything from a ration card to a voter's id card ...
Every year I end up blocking or losing large chunks of MY hardearned money either in a bid to save MY money or as a penalty pay a government who does diddly squat for me.
I would like to be a good citizen, but I honestly don't see why the onus of paying for infrastructure and the like (which is actually the government's responsibility to give ) is only on us the salaried class. How many crores of rupees get laundered in the portals of this country more so in the hallowed bastions of those upholders of the law.
Its more like they can't be satisfied. Not only do these politicians make more than they should be... but they also end up pocketing our hard earned money. Where else could it possibly go if it is not being put to good use.
And these same guys have the audacity to come back to us to look for our votes to put them back at the recieving end of these endless cash drops.

When the past comes haunting

I have had my fair share of bad relationships. In fact some of the sagas would make pretty good scripts for the reigning soap opera factory queen of our country. But jokes apart, when it comes to friends there are times when you feel you should do something to narrow the rift.
You should set aside the reasons that caused the rift, even if they were heartbreaking and try and salvage a relationship. I did try that recently with a friendship. And you know the sad part - I failed. All those reasons seem to have been just locked away by both of us in the hope that probably we would not feel it.
But the history is there and for some reasons bygones just cant seem to remain bygones. What I feel right now is a mixed bag of emotions. I feel sad that I failed at a friendship, I feel angry that the other side just can't see my point of view, Am happy that I finally will be putting this relationship in the past.

Greener pastures are calling!!!

Sudhakar and I have been mulling about moving out of the country. More so for the sake of our daughter. Its not that we need to make more money... we have enough of it thank you... Its just that this place seems to be to scary to live in anymore.
I keep wondering what will happen when my daughter hits her teenage. I would be scared to send her to a friend's party. Forget the moral police, the regular men in khakhi have taken it on themselves to be custodians of the elusive Indian culture. In Bangalore, the Indian culture is given a further narrow meaning with "Kannadiga culture".
I mean
1) Speak the local lingo or else auto drivers take you for a ride and cops don't register your complaint. A pre-dominantly Kannadiga office can get pretty uncomfortable.
2) Its wrong for women to wear western clothes since anything that comes to knee length is considered "scantily dressed". What will it be next - saree blouses that cover stomachs and salwar kameezes instead of school skirts?
3) Western music is bad... it should always be Kannada music - Then why in the world is Sandalwood's top most music director Guru Kiran obsessed with adding English lyrics to his songs? What classification do those come under?

There is no safety in this place, neither is there freedom of individual choice. Heck, I am even being told what to wear and whether to celebrate a party or not. If social work is what is on the minds of these people, I can give you guys a lot better things to burn your energies after. For the cops the best advice would be to try and do your jobs correctly. Stop turning the blind eye. Seriously kick butt when it comes to offenders. And leave us and our families alone. What they need protection from is from the likes of people like you.

For all those obsessing about "culture". Get out of those denim wear and then talk. Stop wearing branded exports... stop ogling at girls in western wear, remember your sisters and mothers in salwars too are not safe. Lust, you see, doesn't really bother about clothing. Stop aiming for jobs in MNCs, that is as western as it gets. Stop haunting all the coffee, burger and drinking joints. They are all a western influence. Hell! stop taking allopathic medicine and get back to basics - Ayurveda. Practice what you preach - it kinda helps set an example the good way.

Defending the offenders

My husband is a musician, a percussionist to be precise. He has played at several shows, big and small. There are several forums in the city that provide a free platform to budding musicians to perform and several times Sudhakar has gone there to perform with his band. As with all public functions, the organisers of such shows, always obtain necessary legal and police clearance. But you know, without fail almost everytime, the cops have shown up at these shows and tried to close it down.
1) A 4 pm in the evening on Sunday afternoon, a show was held at the Indira Gandhi park. Permissions in place the show began. But the cops came demanding that the show be shut down - Why??? because the sound was reaching right up to the Court House!!! Get real you defenders of the law. In our country, have you ever heard of the courts functioning on a Sunday??
2) A day before Rajyotsava last year. Garuda Mall had organised for three bands to play on their premises. No sooner had the first Gospel band finished their part, the Ashoknagar cops came and confiscated the speakers. Why? - Because a day before Rajyotsava you should play Kannada songs!!!

Other lame excuses have been that the decibel levels of the shows are too high. Hmmm then here are few questions I would like to ask
- Every year during Ganesh Chaturthi, we have so called "Friends Groups" organising festivities. All these are smack in the middle of residential areas. The megaphones are fitted to the residential buildings themselves and the racket goes on till 12.30 - 1.00 am. First of all its illegal to have these functions in residential areas. Secondly the decibal levels are enough to rouse the dead. Where are you defenders of the law force then?

- Fireworks of a certain decibal are banned. Yet during festivities, the only sound you will hear are of such fireworks that could have the life force of tree trunk stop. What are you people then? when my daughter jumps in fright in her sleep thanks to all the racket at night, where are you oh! defenders of the lost cause.

The legal system has clearly defined your duties for you, yet you go about searching for something new to add to your portfolio. Why don't you men in uniform first do what you are supposed to and then go hunting for new crimes to solve?

Slumdog is not an Indian film

Just after Slumdog Millionaire swept the Oscars today, a friend and I got into a debate on whether the movie won solely because it had a "gora" at the helm of affairs. While my friend believed that it had all to do with the colour of one's skin, I begged to differ. If it had to do with whether your skin was the right shade, A R Rahman did not stand a chance for 2 Oscars he won, neither would Resul Pookutty have been so lucky.
I still have a slight problem with the movie being called an Indian movie. It was neither produced nor directed by an Indian. Sure, the far-from-the-limelight co-director is Indian and so is the theme of the movie and so is a majority of the cast, but then so was Richard Attenborough's Gandhi. Now that isn't being called an Indian film.
Manoj Night Shyamalan's Sixth Sense is not an Indian movie despite being directed by an NRI, neither was Shekar Kapur's Elizabeth movies. So why then are we vying for the Indian tag for a movie that was written by an Indian but which took a firang to make. Moreover, the film has not been nominated in the "Best Foreign Film Category", but rather in the other popular categories.
Make no mistake, am over the moon about us finally being recognised on the international arena. But then this could have happened years ago had we had a board that could decide on a movie that truly represented what Indian cinema was about. While Tare Zameen Par was an excellent movie by Indian standards, its subject line was something the rest of the world dealt with in the 60s and 70s. So in all probability they must have thought we were retards who had not understood the intricacies of a learning disorder.
We have a board that sends only Hindi films and that too crocks of poop like Eklavya and Paheli, all in the name of representing Indian culture. So now when a movie like Slumdog Millionaire has a kid literally jump into a crock of poop, we automatically claim the movie for our own. What happened to all the culture worshippers now...
We need to stop trying to ride on the success of foreigners. We are making films that are better than a Slumdog Millionaire. It is our own people who prevent it from being showcased on the international arena.
But through it all I truly applaud A R Rahman. He has done the country proud and finally put us on the international cinematic map.

The Indian traveller

I am sure that there are a multitude of Indians for whom globetrotting is like a second skin. These people are the polished ones, who represent our country and our culture really well. These are the people who have an intelligent repartee to those set of foreigners who actually ask us "where we park our elephants?" (Believe it or not, my friend who freelanced as a tour guide for visitors from cruise ships was actually asked this question).
But unfortunately these guys are just a drop in the ocean. They form part of a minute fraction of Indians who actually know to conduct themselves on the foreign arena. Here is a sample of the kind that really represent us.

A young newly married couple (no it doesn't matter whether they were north or south Indians) came to the reception of the hotel I was staying at. The man bellows for a room and was informed that he would have to put down a deposit. To which the man takes a 100 USD note and flings it onto the receptionist. He then asks what comes "Free" with the room. As it goes breakfast and cocktails are free for the room he has rented. Since it was evening the man thought that it be pertinent he ask for something in place of breakfast since he had already missed it.

So the receptionist replies sweetly that the water in the room and the sachets of tea and coffee were complimentary. Next the man asks for a room with "a good scenery" since the couple was just back from Bali and the view he got was bad for a price that was too high.

Its sad that such uncouth people actually represent our country in this manner. We went to a massage parlour and the owner by way of conversation said that most of the Indians walked into his parlour and the first thing they asked for was discount. And they never ever thanked the staff for their courtesy. When it comes to Indian shoppers, the first word on the tips of their tongues are "discounts". I mean if you are walking into a store that is already selling you stuff at a 10 per cent discount, what more do you want. We need to understand that street shopping is in designated places in foreign countries, not in the big stores where fixed prices are exactly that - fixed.

Another friend was also talking about how difficult it is for an Indian coming to Singapore to rent a flat. He says the best way to do this is to go through an Indian agent, who will find you a flat that is owned by an Indian. A Singaporean will almost never rent out a flat to an Indian simply because we don't know how to maintain it.

The impressions we make on the international front are really pathetic and the sad part is that it reflects badly on the small minority that do know how to conduct themselves

Mourning our loss of potential

Am now back in Bangalore after a week in Singapore. I went there once before when I was kid (hehehe, will not specify how many years ago. I don't want to feel old). Of course there are many of you out there who have travelled much more than I have, but then hey!!! this is my blog and so I get to say what I want right?
No point in raving about the cleanliness of the place or the fact that even the trees on avenues seemed to have some order to the way they are placed. What really amazed me for one is the traffic sense of the country. Not once, throughout my stay there did I see a single traffic cop. The roads are manned completely by signals and not once.... and I mean it... not once did I see a person speed past a red light or move onto the pedestrian crossing when the light for the walkers was green.
What amazed me even more was the fact that even if there was a free left which allowed vehicles right of way, they would stop in a line to let the pedestrians cross. You could literally close your eyes and walk when you see the green light and know for sure that you will not end up in pieces on God's lap.
The roads don't have a single pothole (but then I guess the craters of the moon are an Indian road side specialty). And you can actually get fined for going at a lower speed (there its around 80 mph) in most places. You can cover a distance of 10 kms in as many minutes. The public transportation in terms of the bus, MRT and the taxi service is not only cheap, it is also reliable, thus reducing the need to own a vehicle.
This in turn has reduced vehicular traffic and thereby pollution, traffic jams, road rage and so much. And all this is because, the tax rates are high and you know that they are being used for the betterment of the people. In our country all we know is that most of the taxes go in lining the pockets of our leaders.
My colleagues and I were constantly discussing the fact that our country will most probably never see this kind of progress, simply because they say the problem is too deep rooted and the population too vast. But all it takes is for each person to feel that they should do they duty to the country. Following simple habits can lead to a larger change. As utopic as it sounds, I feel that each state has a likelihood of being like Singapore. While the planning can take place at the central level, the execution should take place at the state. The underlining factor should however be that the political honchos should start doing it for the people.

Am coming home !!!!

I haven't been on my blog for a week simply because I have been in Singapore, lugging around a laptop after having left the charger back home. Yes intelligent tinged with the utmost sarcasm is the same thing that crossed my mind. But now I am at a friend's place, on the last day in town and I finally have access to the Net.
What will follow in the blog for the next couple of posts will be what I call the Singapore Jaunt series. I am not really going to rave about how beautiful or pristine the set up here is but rather I want to draw attention to the simple ways in which out spectacular country would actually improve - be it in traffic management, pollution control, respect for people, freedom in its true sense and so much more. I look forward to writing them and I hope you agree with the points I have to make.

The all-knowing aunt!!!

The All-Knowing Aunt (AKA) can be captured best at family weddings. Right from the time I have been able to understand a part of the intricacies of a wedding, I have noticed that it is not the father and mother of the bride who will be at the helm of affairs. Rather it is this AKA who will be bellowing orders, putting people in place, telling one and all how the ceremony should be conducted (sometimes she even tells off the priests involved). She is the one who knows the exact way in which the pallu of the saree has to be draped, how many flowers right down to the petal have to be on the garland or in the hair of the bride.
So much does the AKA assume power that almost everyone in the family too looks up to her for advice on even the smallest of issues. And God forbid you decide to cross paths with the AKA... you are in for a whole range of scowls, disapproving chuckles, I-told-you-so looks and more.
If you are among those who haven't yet encountered the AKA here are ways to spot her at the next family wedding.
1) She will be in a saree that is several notches grander than the mother of the bride
2) She will be the one who is frantically waving to waiters/priests/food bearers and even the couple themselves.
3) She will be the one hovering close to the pandal/dias holding trays of flowers/rice/gifted envelopes.
4) She will be the one who tries to get into all the photos
5) She is the one you will spot all over the wedding hall. It reaches a point that no matter where you look, she will be there.

Are we really regressing?

In all the brouhaha that surrounds the Mangalore pub incident and the moral policing that seems to have our country in its grips, I wish to digress a bit. We all keep talking about how, with such incidents we are going back to the stone ages and are becoming neanderthals all over again. But if you really go back in time, you will see that women actually had much more freedom back then, than they do now.
Sure you would counter it by saying that Indian society was not that liberal. But then think about it, even if women were kept in seclusion, it was because they were respected for being women, not because people were scared that they would spoil the sanctity of society or breech the line of male perverseness. This was on the royal front.
On the more local fronts, the status of homemakers was a hallowed one - now being a housewife is equated with being dumb and not having much else to your credit. In the days of the Raj - men and women did socialise together, they did enjoy a drink or two together. Inter-religious alliances though not commonplace were not really frowned upon.
So can we possibly say that our society is going back in time. Its actually entering a phase that we have never seen before. Mentalities seem to have shrunk to very narrow proportions. The perverted minority seem to have a stronger hold than the educated minority simply because we have a majority who sit on the fence when it comes to taking a stand.

Twisted morality

Valentine's day is not in Indian or rather the SRS version of the Indian culture. Since the members of the "hallowed" and hollow organisation has not really seen the world beyond their dirt-ridden front doorsteps, we could grant them the ignorance of knowing that the world has evolved a great deal since the stone ages.
What I would really like to know is if the SRS is trying to state that Hindu culture actually represents the whole of the "Indian" culture. The last time I checked, my Christian culture was a whole lot different and I am sure so is that of the several communities that form a democratic India. And we all have been living quite happily thank you very much.
Let me try and talk in your language... and no offence to any of my friends.
I am a Christian from Mangalore married to a Brahmin Konkana from Kerala. I respect both religions equally and completely. When I got married I put mehendi on my hands which is essentially a muslim custom, largely used in North India. I am sure there is not one Hindu wedding that does not have mehendi as part of their ceremony. That's not part of your culture - you want to stop that?.
Some of the top colleges in India belong to Christian outfits.... why do your Hindu brethren fall over themselves to get admissions here. Can't you cater to their needs?
Take some of the hospitals too... Why do you want treatment at hospitals that are not promoted by those that follow the "Indian" culture.
If you are worried about the youth following Valentine's Day and getting morally corrupt why aren't you waging a war on
1) Drug peddlers whose main source of income as youngsters (many drug peddlers follow your own breed of "Indian culture"
2) Why aren't you making a noise about corruption among the police that has led to thousands of atrocities against women go unheard of ? (hell these guys are most of the time the criminals themselves)
3) Why don't you catch hold of pimps who would sell their mothers and children for a buck? (prostitution is not in any humane culture. No woman would voluntarily live such a life)

I guess since it has been proved that a majority of people who constitute such groups are illiterate and cannot hold down a decent job, they get paid by power hungry politicians to run such campaigns. At least the money is coming from somewhere for these people.
It does seems strange doesn't it that till the pub incident in Mangalore - there weren't any real raised voices about women/pubs/indian culture put together. But as soon as it happened, you had the culprits out on bail. Yeddy condemning the "plub" culture, Nirmala Venkatesh actually blaming the victims and a host of politicians waking up to the "pub culture". It looks to well orchestered.
We live in a democracy... the central government in power too has not right to dictate what I want to celebrate and what I can't. Valentine's day falls under the purview of being perfectly legal. So who in the world gave you self-righteous people the right to intrude in my life.
The fact that Muthalik has been quoted in the media saying that his members will create havoc on V-Day and nothing has happened in terms of his judicial custody just goes to show that people like Yeddy don't have a backbone. Their rule is completely dictated by anti-social elements who have their brains and their rear ends constantly forgetting their rightful places.
I hate to think what this country will be like when my daughter grows up

Circle of Life

... And the predictable has happened... the saffron brigade has got its way once again. All those goons including their leader are out on bail. Can political leanings get more transparent than this. So while those custodians of "our" culture are out plotting their next move to save us, I thought of digressing from all that is depressing.
When I was expecting Anoushka, sudhakar and I made a list of all the animation movies we wanted her to see when she got to an age where she could understand things. And so we invested in it all... Cinderella, The Jungle Book, 101 Dalmations, Pooh and Friends...
When I put the first DVD for Anoushka she looked at it for a good 5 and half seconds and then turned her little bottom in its direction and went off. I was really upset when this happened... But I did not let go.. Ever so slowly her interest levels increased.... and I noticed that it was not so much for Cinderella, than it was for her friends, Jaq and Gus who were mice!!!!
In The Jungle Book, she was in love with Baloo the Bear and his antics and Kaa the snake and an absolute disciple of Colonel Haathi the elephant.
When I told mom this she told me that not too many years ago, these were the very same animation movies that I loved to watch day in and out (on VHS of course, I come from that era) and the funny part was that I loved those movies for exactly the same reasons. I loved it when people fell or made funny sounds and now all these years later.. it feels great to see my daughter love exactly the same things.
When I see her laughing for all those kiddie cute scenes, I feel well very nostalgic and very happy...

Yeddy, steady, get lost!!!

Am still not sure what Yeddy said the other day... Was it pub culture or 'plub' culture that he was planning on doing away with? Now drinking is against "our" culture... so let me see... Drinking in a pub is not in our culture, the youngsters are badly influenced and the women are corrupted, so the solution, lets shut down all pubs. Sure by all means go ahead.. shut them down.

But let me ask you this... are you also going to shut down the thousands of liquor shops across the state. They sell alcohol too... a huge section of the population, young and old also are customers here. They drink themselves silly and are an equal menace... Youngsters drink here too and perpetrate their 'crimes'. Why just youngsters, alcoholics of all shapes, sizes and ages are customers and unleash themselves on their family and society. Aren't they all against 'your' culture? Yeddy why don't you make Karnataka a dry state.... let's see how 500 crore out of your exchequer affects the corrupt lifestyle of your kind.
And another point just came to mind --- Girls going to pubs are against our culture... this at a time when the central government actually consented to women bar tenders!!!! Didn't you guys get the memo or what???
Goons such as the SRS molest girls in the name of saving their dignity and they do so knowing that they have your blessings. You should be ashamed of actually standing up and taking their side. Before you pass such ridiculous statements and back such absurd lunatics such as Gehlot and Muthalik, why don't you run a dipstick survey. Run it by your family... in case you haven't noticed, they don't stand by your sentiments. And they have actually gone public with that!!!!!
http://www.indianexpress.com/news/karnataka-cm-says-he-wont-allow-pub-culture-his-daughter-disagrees/416853/

The eternal approval seekers!!!

When an issue gets my goat, I often tend to have verbal diarrhoea. So I have made an effort to write on a something other than the Mangalore episode that caught my attention last night. But as a prelude, here is something that was told to me quite a few years ago. Ask a child of any nationality which is the greatest country in the world and the child would answer with the name of his own country. But ask an Indian child the same question and 9 out 10 would answer - America. As a nation we have always been obsessed with the "Big Brother" nation and its opinion about us. No matter what, we always try to remain in their good books, this despite being a larger democracy population-wise.
Anyways coming to the point that really got me thinking.
I was reading the Barack Obama edition of India Today. The intro to the story actually carried a line that goes like this. .... "becoming possibly the first American President to mention 'Hindu' in an inaugural speech..."
This really got me wondering what the context was all about and so I got a transcript of the speech online to see. And the line goes thus ... "We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus, and nonbelievers." - Now what in the world is so extraordinary about this. Are we so starved for attention that one inane reference in a presidential speech actually warrants a mention in a magazine of such calibre. Its almost as if our nation achieved demi-god status with Barack Obama's speech.
At the same time, a news channel made a huge hue and cry about the fact that A R Rahman's Slumdog Millionaire jackpot song 'Jai Ho' was used on an international ramp during a fashion show. Granted that A R Rahman deserves all the credit but come on guys, this is not the first time Indian music has been used internationally and will most certainly not be the last. The international world has had a taste of India for years now... right from firangs turning to India for moksha, to Indian motifs being displayed on clothes and bodies, to yoga, to ..... the list goes on.
Of course there are several more such cases. Why do we still feel the need to prove ourselves internationally and try and ride out on really silly international recognition. Why can't we display the attitude that comes with being a success internationally with class, rather than behave as we are being done a favour.

What culture are we talking about?

Politics has never interested me, primarily because we have a bunch of illiterate goons, with money and muscle power who always seem to be able to get the votes their way. Yes I do belong to the category of people who don't vote at all out of disgust. I don't because I don't see how it makes a difference. Despite what happened in Gujarat, Modi is still the CM. If opinions did come into play, I don't see how he could have won with a majority.
The pub incident in Mangalore has now become a political game. All of a sudden you have our so-called leaders from across parties saying that pubs and now malls are bad and against our culture. If that was so, how come so many of you and your ilk have invested all your black money into them? Why are you and your families seen shopping and dining there. Why are your children getting drunk at these places, running over people and then getting away scot-free?
If drinking is against your "culture" why do you organise dance shows and distribute free liquor in the hope of securing votes from the lower classes. Aren't you ruining culture then?
When you get your daughters married off, why buy designer wear from malls and abroad? Why have their birthday bashes in 5-star hotels? Where the hell is your FRIGGING culture then?
Today its pubs and malls where "boys and girls hold hands"... (sic) Gehlot. Tommorrow, watching movies is bad, riding a bike together is bad influence, co-ed schools breed illicit relations and then what, you guys planning on making us carry identification as to what relations we have with the men we are with? If I want to hold my boyfriend's or my husband's hand, that is my wish. Am not making out in public and am open about my relationship, which is more than anyone can say about people like the "moral police". Custodians of culture by daylight and hell's scum by night. Don't you guys see, moral policing is not a legitimate career option.. why can't you think of something more befitting for your kind.
It public knowledge how many of the political "fraternity" have dozens of mistresses, how many brothels you visit... how many drunken parties you people have... where is your "FRIGGING" culture then?
Plain and simple how many politicians and so called members of the moral police do you know are teetotallers and brahmacharis. Hell! these are the guys that can get the best of alcohol served to them in jail.

Forerunners in misguiding youth

Pramod Muthalik, national president of the Rashtriya Hindu Sena feels that the girls of today are misguided and it is the responsibility of groups like his to make sure they are brought on track.
Hmmm.. when did you become the father of every girl who decides to lead her life the way she wants. What culture are you talking about when all the hooligans in your group are uneducated, have track records in eve teasing, are the first guys to try and get into pubs, have absolutely no respect for their parents ( I say this based on how they treated people at the pub in Mangalore).
Imagine the heartache they would have caused their mothers who saw them on national TV. If these are the guys who are supposed to set an example on how an Indian girl should behave... I sure as hell wouldnt want them anywhere close to my children. What a bad influence.
Just as my child is my responsibility, so every child in the pub that day is the responsibility of another set of parents.
If Muthalik feels that it would have been ok to beat up his sister if she had been there... then I am surprised... does Indian culture according to you allow strange men to discipline your sibling. Is it ok in the bargain if she gets groped and mauled by a stranger.
I am from Mangalore. I have been a student there and I have been married there and I have a child who was born there. I enjoy a beer once in a while. If I had gone to the pub with my husband who according to "your culture" is like my guardian, would it be wrong then. Would your beating me up have any justification ?(not that it does).
Instead of poking your noses where it is not supposed to be... why don't you people work towards a better goal. If you are so concerned about the welfare of women, why don't you work towards making this country safer for women. Volunteer to safely take women home after a night shift, volunteer your services for better treatment of women in the home, office and social spheres, make sure women and child trafficking do not happen your respective areas. Be a group that actually has a worthwhile ideal to look up to and be known for. What do you people hope to achieve other than public disdain and animosity.
Pramod Muthalik talks of rapes and unwanted pregnancies - yes these do happen when youth are misdirected... but do you also know that majority of the rapes are almost always within the family and inflicted by people who are known to the victim. What values are you talking about in such situation... where are your culture saving moronic baboons at that time.
If you guys want to stay in the news... do something worth remembering.... if you do.. people will then actually come to you with the publicity you crave

Defenders of the lost cause - II

My home town Mangalore has been at the centre of a great deal of controversies... primary of them being communal riots. Hell breaks lose up north and here you have Mangalore stoking the fires as well. The church attacks were real upsetting and now all of a sudden you have moral policing. While I am dying to spew vitriol in this post, I will refrain since I am making a concentrated effort to clean up my language considering I have a daughter whose mind is quite like a sponge.
A pub was attacked recently by self proclaimed Sri Rama Sene activists, claiming that women drinking in public and dancing was against Indian culture. But of course for the men it was ok. Hmmm so its ok for men to drink themselves silly, possibly sleep around with the neighbour's wife in an inebrieted state, run over a few people on the way home and then expect his wife to be the picture of innocence... all because he is the male in this entire picture.
What bullshit!!!!!. Look into your own houses, you stupid, uneducated, narrow minded jerks... for all the machoisms that you people display, you guys are the first ones to eve tease a girl... irrespective of whether she is in a saree, a skirt or even a burqa... as long as its a girl, men of your nature will have their family heirlooms on constant fire.
Who made you people more worthy than women... have you forgotten the basic fact that you need us to actually exist.
Women and men of today know how to conduct themselves in a public arena. They are adults and have the god-damn freedom to drink and dance in public. If you want to practice your so-called culture, understand what it is first. Indian culture has always respected women. Having a beer on a weekend with friends, Hindus, Muslims, Sikhs, Christians, black, white, alien, what difference does it make. More important, how does it scratch your nuts?
I think I see the problem with you men. You guys are just jealous that you can't do what so many other NORMAL youngsters do at the same age. You dysfunctional morons can't get a girl to look at you, let alone go out with you and hence you take out this frustration under the garb of saving our culture.
Can't you see, you numbskulls, women would rather go out with a Muslim boy they trust to protect them from Hindu fanatics like you. No religion in the world has every dictated terms on how one should live their social lives. The bottom line has always been to lead one's life without being a burden or trouble to others. How does a group of girls and boys sharing a drink come close to troubling others. They share a normal rapport, in a public environment. Its THEIR OWN LIVES. They are minding their business, why can't you guys. You want to beat people up... catch child molestors and maul them, catch robbers who murder for a few hundred bucks, kick the politicians you back you scumbags for reducing this democratic nation to a bunch of babbling religious freaks. Do something more useful in your own families and lives. Leave those leading their lives alone. They do it with their families' blessings and don't need your misguided sense of propriety in any way.

Good at juggling??

I work from home and I still get to hear how lucky I am to be able to pursue my career and look after my baby. Well, I don't deny it, it really is true... I am among possibly the lucky few whose resume will not reflect a break barring my maternity leave. In this day and age, such a resume can work wonders for you. But I must also add for all those out there, who think this is the idyllic situation, that its not all roses.
Let's take the work situation. Being a journalist, my job demands that I remain online and accessible throughout the day. I am for most times. But then Anoushka decides to go ballistic on the days I have a lot of work to do. From her point of view it makes complete sense. Mom is at home all the time, why does she sit with the laptop, let her play with me. So you have a bawling kid, when you are speaking to a client in Singapore. Or she will need to poop just when you need to send an urgent mail. Your work schedule and its completion depends entirely on your child's routine. Her mealtimes, bath times, play times etc all have to be worked in along with a packed schedule from office. And God save you on the days that the domestic help does not turn up or on the days that your baby falls ill. And trust me they happen only when you can least afford for anything to go wrong. Whether you believe it or not there was one day, when I actually was on the phone with Mumbai, sending a mail on the laptop, feeding Anoushka a chapati and cooking a gravy for dinner all at the same time, with the laptop in the kitchen.
There are days when it can all get to you and I have just sat down, put my head in my hands and bawled my heart out.
On the work front is another scenario that you will find. The syndrome out of sight is out of mind fits here perfectly. While people remember you when there is work to be done from your department, you will not be remembered at other times. Bosses forget to appraise you with the rest, important office circulars don't get mailed to you, it is taken for granted that since you are working at home you have all the time in the world to take on bakra work and worse still, for those colleagues who don't have kids - they believe that since you work from home, you don't do anything at all. One guy even called me at 9 in the morning and asked me if he had woken me up!!!. Such indifference does hurt a lot. You tend to miss out on the social aspects of being in a work environment.
But make no mistake. Just because I do feel low at times does not mean I am not enjoying the good luck I have to see my daughter grown each day.

Defenders of the lost cause

Those who are parents will know of this situation. Put two toddlers together and you will actually see them have an entire conversation in a language that is alien. But don't you doubt for a second that the children do not understand each other or have not connected. What has allowed for this connection to happen is the unfettered and unbiased understanding that 'we are both kids and so therefore we will get along.' Not for the child the division based on language, caste, religious belief or even diet for that matter.

Its only when you get to the age of what are now referred to as mature individuals that you look down your nose at those who may not be like you. That would only explain the most idiotic events that get reported in the papers - defenders of the culture trash a cinema hall screening Kannada movies because of a border dispute with the state. You morons... how in the world does trashing a cinema affect border politics. There are government sanctioned organisations that claim to go around a save our respective cultures - how do they do that - trash anything that does not indentify with culture.
So is that what the great Indian mentality is - If it is not mine, its up for being destroyed. A friend's band was playing a gig at Garuda Mall a day before Rajyotsava. The cops came and shut it down saying that a day before Rajyotsava, you should only play Kannada songs. WHAT!!! In what way does that make me a better Kannadiga and what about a day after the event... is it ok to play English music then.
Who gives these guys the right to defend a culture that belongs to so many other people. Why destroy the name of culture in the name of defending it? Don't you people realise that you are only creating more animosity in a world that does not really need it right now? And once again, the oft asked question, what do these nitwits really know about their own culture? Who can really define culture? In which cultured society does it make sense to destroy public property, vandalise private property and physically hurt people for border politics which the government is endorsing... how thick can skulls get????